Sanford and Son Episode Rating Graph

Lamont is a judge for the Miss Watts Business Wife and the winner of the pageant wins $1,000. Fred quickly makes it clear that he will do anything to get his hands on the money. He even agrees to transform Aunt Esther into an elegant beauty as part of a bet he has with her husband, Woody.

Lamont advises Fred to donate a collection of Blind Mellow Jelly records to a music library for a tax write-off. After doing so, Fred finds out from an appraiser that the records are valued at five hundred dollars. Fred, with dollar signs in his eyes, has Bubba act as though he were the son of Blind Mellow Jelly in an attempt to get them back.

Lamont and Rollo are planning a double date and they have a plan to get Fred out of the house so they can have it all to themselves. However, Fred catches on and Lamont and Rollo must make do with the cramped quarters of Rollo's apartment, but they still have problems, the girls aren't happy with the entire arrangement, right down to the refreshments, that's when Fred steps in.

In order to keep The Sanford Arms, Fred and Lamont must raise $4,000 in a week. They begin to scramble and Fred turns to gambling. First he puts together a card game and plays against a hustler and then he makes a little trip to the horse track and bets on the horses. Finally, a trip to a casino ends with unexpected results.

Fred gets a letter in the mail from someone named Carol who claims that Fred knew her 40 years ago and that she's coming for a visit. However, Fred doesn't recall knowing any Carols and is in for a shock when Carol turns out to be a man. Another shock, Carol claims that he and Fred robbed a bank years ago.

Fred becomes smitten with a woman, Miss Wallace who comes to the Sanford residence looking for a place to stay at the Sanford Arms. Meanwhile, a thief has been spotted in the neighborhood and to get the reward money, Fred lets the cops set up a stakeout in his home. However, Fred is in for a shock since the thief has been in disguise as Miss Wallace.

Lamont is disgusted when he receives a traffic ticket for failure to yield on a right turn. Lamont is sure he did the most prudent thing for the situation and lets Fred talk him into fighting the ticket in court. Lamont is prepared to fight for himself but once in the court room he finds himself being represented ... by Fred!

The cast appears on Wheel and Deal, hosted by Harry Monty.

Grady is getting too many Social Security checks in the mail and he is contemplating on whether or not he should be honest about reporting them or not. He finally decides the latter and keeps them, gambling them away in Las Vegas. Aunt Esther hits the ceiling when she learns of the situation and just then a phone call from the Social Security office comes into the Sanford residence.

After promising Fred that he will keep certain rules alive while he's in St. Louis, Grady tries to keep the house free of Aunt Esther's Bible meetings as well as not allowing Lamont and Rollo to have a party with a couple of fine ladies. In response, Lamont changes all the locks in the house when Grady goes out to a movie, however, Aunt Esther and the members of her Bible meeting become the next interference.

Grady has been left in charge while Fred is visiting family in St. Louis and has promised to look after Lamont who comes home with a bloody nose, courtesy of Jo-Jo Jackson, after a fight over a woman. After taking a couple of karate lessons, Lamont goes back to the bar to confront Jo-Jo. However, a concerned Grady, decides tries to intervene.

When a man stops by the Sanford residence seeking funds for a heart association, Lamont, finds out some interesting facts about heart attacks and decides to use the info to his advantage. The next time Fred has a supposed heart attack, Lamont doesn't take no for an answer and Fred ends up in the hospital for a checkup.

With Fred in St. Louis, Grady has been put in charge of taking care of his garden. Grady quickly notices a strange plant growing and assumes that it's wild parsley. However, Rollo is convinced it's marijuana and Lamont decides to turn it into the police. However, when Smitty and Hoppy arrive, the plants are gone but Grady has made dinner for everyone, a nice big salad for everyone.

Lamont leaves town with Rollo to go on a fishing trip but before he goes, he makes a bet with Fred. He is sure Fred won't make money during the week he is gone. Fred sets to prove him wrong by renting out Lamont's room. Fred finds himself in a bind when the pregnant girl he boarded goes into labor.

Lamont comes home one evening and discovers Fred preparing a gourmet dinner and learns it's to celebrate the arrival of an old friend of Fred's, Bowlegs, a musician, who's visiting. Bowlegs' act is to be put on at a nightclub but when his partner strains his back, Fred and Lamont must fill in to fulfill the nightclub's requirements.

Fred's friend, Yerby is the manager of a champion boxer, Junior Joe Louis. Fred goes in and buys half ownership. Fred then begins training the boxer for an upcoming fight but soon runs into trouble. For Junior is pulled from the fight because of to Fred's stubbornness.

Rollo and Lamont are managing a girl singing group from Philadelphia, The Three Degrees. They stay at the Sanford house while preparing for a talent show at the Safari Club. Fred is against the notion at first until he meets the three sexy girls. At the Safari Club, Lamont is surprised when Fred and his friends arrive and they start heckling the other acts.

Fred and Lamont buy a load of copper from a man that has been stealing copper in the neighborhood. The man is late for a meeting with Lamont at the diner because he is ripping off the Sanford plumbing pipes, which he then sells to Fred and Lamont.

A tenant at The Sanford Arms doesn't have enough money for the rent so he leaves Fred his pet elephant as collateral. Fred quickly finds a city official on his back for keeping an elephant in the neighborhood and he quickly comes up with an idea to make some money: put on a mini-circus. Bubba plays a clown, Esther a fire-eater, and Lamont a weight lifter.

Fred cleans the house from top to bottom and Lamont is stunned. Then he learns the reason: Fred's baby sister, Frances is visiting to announce her engagement. Fred is excited, but he soon finds her fiance, Rodney is white.

Lamont visits an astrologist and discovers he's a double Libra, thus his goal in life is for peace and decides to get along with his father at all costs. Meanwhile, Fred eats a batch of 8 day-old greens and gets sick and becomes convinced he's dying. This leads to Grady spreading the word of Fred's supposedly impending death, which draws Aunt Esther and her friends out of the woodwork.

After Fred gets a minor injury from a car accident, Lamont and Fred seek to find a maid to help out around the house. After looking, they get what the agency has at the bottom of the barrel. However, the erratic white woman does nothing but add to Fred's pain.

Saturday night sees Fred heading over to Donna's for a date that he didn't tell her about before hand. Once he arrives, he discovers Donna already has a date with a man who's won the decathlon every year in the Senior Olympics. Wanting to outdo him, Fred decides to compete in the Olympics this year and beat his romantic competition.

Lamont's Uncle George dies and in his will he gives Lamont $7,000 if he weds and has a child and names it after his uncle and he has a year to do all this. Lamont has decided not to get married any time soon but blinded by dollar signs, Fred sneaks down to a dating service to match Lamont up with an available woman. Lamont catches on to Fred's plan and makes up a plan of his own to intervene.

Fred has been watching way too much television and Lamont suggests that he go out and get some exercise. Fred scoffs and refuses which leads to an argument which results in the television breaking. Lamont refuses to get it fixed until Fred agrees to start exercising. Lamont later brings in a doctor to hypnotize Fred to help him get over his television addiction.

A Japanese land development company wants to buy out the neighborhood with plans to build a brewery in the area. Fred, holding out gets bitten by greed. Fred's greed is disguised as a "heartwarming" sentimentality and he's using it to squeeze as much money as he can get out of the developer.

The diamond thieves continue their plot to have Fred smuggle the stolen diamonds into the United States. Freddy Wells sneaks into Fred's hotel room and plants the diamonds in his suitcase. Later, Lamont and Fred discover the diamonds and hesitate to call the police.

Fred returns from his extended trip to St. Louis and Lamont, Donna, Aunt Esther, Bubba, Rollo and Grady have planned a surprise party for his return. Fred no more than steps in the door and Aunt Esther and him are at each other's throats. However, the real problem comes when Fred does some eavesdropping on Lamont and Grady.

Fred is up in arms when he discovers his neighbor, Julio's family is visiting and may move out to California. However, things really hit the fan when Fred learns that Lamont has asked Julio's sister, Maria out, something Fred is totally against.

Grady has a a piece of juicy gossip and is just dying to tell everyone. It seems Grip, an old friend, dated Fred's late-wife, Elizabeth, prior to her getting married to Fred. Elizabeth and Grip had been intimate and Lamont is the result. Fred is convinced Grip is nothing but a "jive turkey" and Esther may have the answer to this paternity question.

Lamont has decided to go in on a partnership with Julio in a used auto parts business venture and Fred becomes convinced that Lamont is abandoning their junk business. Against the whole notion, Fred decides he's not going to stay where he's not wanted and gets a bed at the local mission. Lamont and Julio cook up a scheme in order to lure him back to his home.

Lamont's mother-in-law to be is coming to Watts for a visit and Fred is a little concerned about what she's going to think of a common junk man. This leads Fred to decide to create a legacy and tries to set a world's record and get his name in the Guinness Book of World Records. His goal is to be the person to stay awake the longest.

Fred becomes a victim of a con game when, two men convince him to begin a bogus special "Sanford & Son" sales promotion, in which the lucky winner wins $500. However, Fred has no intention of handing out that much bread but unknown to Fred, the con men have rigged the game so they end up being the lucky winners and Fred will have to pay them the money after all.

Fred and Lamont have bills coming out of their ears and consider going on welfare, something Fred refuses to do. Fred comes up with a plan to throw a "big party" in the Sanford home and charge admission. That's when two hoods show wanting a part of the action. Meanwhile, Aunt Esther is trying to find a place to hold her weekly church group meetings.

Lamont comes down hard on Fred to try to get him to quit smoking and has him go to the doctor for a chest x-ray. Later, the results are sent in the mail and Fred becomes convinced he has tuberculosis.

Lamont has gotten a part in a community play and has great news, George Foreman has agreed to appear in it as well. Dying to meet the boxer, Fred intrudes on the rehearsals and drives the director up the wall, which leads him to quit. This is when Fred steps in as director and makes some immediate changes.

While collecting junk, Lamont runs across an old suitcase and decides it could be worth something. However, once he gets it home, Fred makes a shocking discovery when he opens the case to discover that it is stuffed with money. Lamont wants to turn the money in and Fred wants to keep it and locks in a safe. Just then a gunman shows up wanting the money.

Aunt Esther and Woody have decided to have a baby and set up an appointment with an adoption agency to adopt an older child. However, on the day of a preliminary interview, Woody, so nervous about the prospects of being a father, gets drunk, threatening their chances for an adoption. A heartbroken Esther turns to Fred for help.

Lamont has been in a daze around the house, singing songs and incredibly cheerful to everyone he talks to. Grady and Fred deduce that the boy must be in love. Fred learns that Lamont is on the verge of proposing marriage to one particular girl who works at a dress shop. So he goes down to meet her and is in for a shock, since the girl turns out to be a woman at least ten years older than Lamont.

Julio's sister and nephew, Carlotta and Roberta, are coming for a visit and Julio has a problem, they are allergic to his pet goat, Chico. Thus, Julio asks Fred and Lamont if it would be okay for them to stay with them. Against the idea at first, Fred quickly softens to them and becomes involved with a problem that Roberto is dealing with at school.

Fred and Lamont's TV set is on it's last legs and Lamont considers buying a brand new one, however Fred buys a used color TV set for cheap. Things get out of hand when Fred's friend Grady stops by and recognizes Fred's new set as his set that was stolen. Fred quickly wants an out of the situation and sells it to his neighbor Julio for $50.

The Sanford home has become a campaign headquarters for the candidate Bob Williams and Fred wants nothing to do with it. However, once Fred discovers, Della Reese is working on the campaign of Williams' opponent, he goes all out for it even thought he's not for the candidate.

In another get rich quick scheme, Fred decides to go down to an escort service with a friend of his and try to apply as escorts. Flatly rejected, Fred decides to open his own escort service complete with false advertising which results in Fred having to escort three ladies in one night.

Lamont goes totally African. He starts to wear African clothing, and yearns to learn more about the culture. At the same time, Fred thinks that the whole thing is ridiculous, that is until a woman from Nigeria visits and explains to Lamont how sacred listening to your father is in African culture and how you should respect him.

Lamont and Grady have an unexpected visitor show up at their doorstep and it turns out to be Woody, Aunt Esther's husband who has been thrown out of the house. Fearing that his marriage is over, Woody asks to stay at the Sanford residence but Grady is against the idea. However, things get worse when Aunt Esther decides to move instead and kicks Woody to the wind.

Fred has been chosen to represent the Watt's businessmen on a community relatives committee and his first official decision is to allow the public library to be open an hour longer. However, his next decision doesn't seem to be so easy to decide after a crooked businessman tries to bribe Fred with $1000 to vote for a building expansion.

The Sanford residence is in chaos and it is all due to Fred's sudden loss of hearing. Lamont is convinced Fred has a problem, but Fred denies it but Lamont takes him to a doctor just the same. However, after the doctor removes the wax build up, Fred decides to stay "deaf" just a little bit longer in an attempt to hold Donna's attention.

Fred wakes up one morning to discover what looks like a robbery took place but learns that there was a small earthquake overnight. Grady breaks the news that a big one is scheduled to hit on the 6th and a fed up Fred decides to sell the house and move. Meanwhile, Fred heads to Las Vegas to avoid the earthquake on the 6th and has a run in with Merv Griffin and Steve and Eydie.

Lamont treats Fred to a dinner and a concert given by B.B. King. After the show, Fred wants to try to sell his songs to B.B., but fails, however, B.B. offers him a book about his life and why he sings the blues. This leads to an invitation for dinner at the Sanfords. While reading the book Fred panics when he reads the reason why B.B. sings the blues. He explains to Lamont that B.B. lost his girl in St. Louis to a guy who wanted to start a business in California. The girl's initials were EW (for Elizabeth Winfield).

Lamont and his fiancee, Janet are just one step away from the alter. However, a kink is put into their plans when after her wedding shower, her ex-husband John shows up. Meanwhile, Lamont has been having pre-wedding jitters and this just adds to them and Janet finds herself dealing with old feelings she thought had died long ago.

Lamont's friend Herman has just gotten out of prison and doesn't have a place to stay. So Lamont invites him to stay at the Sanford residence. However, when Grady learns that he's an ex-con, he nails down everything in the house. Meanwhile, Lamont finds Herman a job at Esther's hardware store and doesn't tell her that he has served time.

Fred's toothache becomes an exercise in patience for Lamont when Fred refuses to see a dentist and instead tries Bubba's home remedy and a hypnotist. Finally, Fred decides to throw in the towel and visits a dentist but insists on a white dentist.

Fred gets a new next door neighbor and is shocked to learn that he is Puerto Rican and planning on opening a junk business of his own. Fred gets upset about the competition and contrives a plan to get the city to condemn his property especially since, Julio has a pet goat.

Lamont has had a chronic headache for three days and isn't sure what's causing it. A doctor suggests that Lamont consult a psychiatrist since the cause may be stress. Once at the psychiatrist's office, the doctor determines that Fred is the cause of Lamont's headaches.

The day has come for Aunt Esther and Woody to meet their son but they are in for a shock when he helps himself to their cash register. Later, Esther is in for an even bigger shock when he announces that he doesn't believe in God. Esther promptly kicks him out and he takes refuge at the Sanford residence.

Aunt Esther and Woody stop by for a visit and as usual, Fred insults Esther and she responds by promptly hitting Fred in the head with her purse. Apparently the blow to his head is so strong that it knocks him out and when he wakes up begins having memory lapses. This prompts him to make up his will and holds a will reading in the living room.

Lamont purchases two coffins from an auction to try and get a profit if he sells them to a funeral parlor. In the process, Fred becomes paranoid by having the coffins in the house and refuses to sleep in the house with the coffins. Lamont doesn't think much of it, until he begins hearing strange noises at night.

Fred gets news that an uncle has died and has left him $1500 in his will. The only thing is, in order to get the money, Fred has to fly to St. Louis to claim it. However, first he must overcome a fear of flying and Lamont is up in arms trying to help him.

Fred and Donna enjoy an evening out on the town but then Donna breaks the news that she has had another man propose marriage to her. Not wanting to lose her, Fred decides to propose marriage himself and they plan a small wedding ceremony. However, Lamont is totally against the whole thing and has Aunt Esther and family confront Donna and question her intentions.

Lamont's latest girlfriend, Judy is falling in love with him and likes the idea of settling down someday with the right guy. However, Lamont isn't too happy with that notion and makes up a lie that Grady is his godfather and they'd need his blessing. Judy moves ahead and goes out of her way to shower Grady with her attention.

Fred wants a new stereo and tries to buy one on credit at a local electronics store. He soon discovers that they don't give credit to people over 60. This prompts him to take some action and befriends a rights group, The Gray Foxes and they begin picketing the store until they decide to change their policies.

Esther has stopped by the Sanford residence to talk Fred into singing for a talent show. Grady is all set to be in the show with a magic act and for his most daring trick ever, he handcuffs Fred and Esther together. The only problem is that he can't understand how to get the two out of this dilemma because the directions for escaping the trick are written in Chinese.

Aunt Esther is fed up with her husband, Woodrow and has decided to end her marriage. She has become convinced that he's seeing other women behind her back and becomes even more convinced when Fred tries to hook him up with a swinger. Refusing to live in the same house with Woody, Esther moves in with Fred and Lamont.

Fred has a romantic night planned with Donna but Aunt Esther drops in at the last moment with some news, her neice, Elizabeth is in town and she wants Fred to have her stay with him. Fred is against the idea at first but when he takes one look at her he agrees, she is the spitting image of his late-wife, Elizabeth. However, there is another problem, Elizabeth is planning to move into an apartment in town and she will have two roommates, one female and the other male.

Julio has moved out of his house and Fred and Lamont decide to buy it and turn it into a boarding house and call it The Sanford Arms. To get enough money for the project, Fred and Lamont go down to the bank to apply for a loan but soon find themselves hostages in a bank robbery attempt.

Grady is bursting with news and breaks it to Fred and Lamont that he's engaged to a woman he met at J.C. Penny. However, Fred and Lamont are shocked to discover the "raging beauty" Grady raved about is not exactly a beauty queen. Fred soon finds Grady spending all his time with her and sets a plan into motion to break them up.

Trying to avoid paying property taxes, Fred registers to become a clergyman for the Divine Profit Church. He appoints Bubba as secretary and Woody as treasurer. However, when the Bishop stops by for a visit, Fred quickly realizes he's put his business in jeopardy thanks to some fine lines in the contact he signed.

Fred is being honored with the Watts Businessman-of-the-Year Award and he's all hyped up about accepting it. However, an unexpected turn of events lands Fred with a serious back problem and takes up means to try to get rid of it, including, acupuncture, meditation and a corset.

Lamont runs into Chuck Barris in a parking lot and he generously gives Lamont four tickets to a taping of The Gong Show, which happens to be Fred's favorite game show. Fred decides to try to be a contestant and sets up an act with his brother-in-law, Rodney and Lamont. However, at the last minute, Rodney hurts his back and can't be in the act.

Fred is sure that his dreams will be good luck in picking numbers for a lottery and his hunch turns out to be true, despite the fact that Lamont forbids him to participate. Fred quickly finds himself $500 richer but also finds Aunt Ethel and Bubba needing quick cash.

Fred makes a deal and buys a horse with a great racing history. Fred tries to get the animal to breed so that he can have a lot of money making champions hoofing and stomping around the place. However, there is just one problem Fred must overcome, the horse he bought is a gelding, which has Lamont saying "I told you so" to yet another one of Fred's moneymaking schemes.

Lamont breaks the news to Fred that he plans to join the crew of a tramp steamer and sail around the world. A shocked Fred gets another shock, Lamont plans on putting him in a retirement home.

Lamont has been seeing Janet for quite awhile and Lamont thinks he's in love. But he doesn't know too much about her and hasn't wanted to push her into telling him. Thus, Fred decides to find out exactly what she's hiding and he goes undercover with Aunt Esther to dig up the dirt.

Lamont has been seeing Janet for some time now and he has decided to pop the question. Lamont tells Fred of his plans and he is happy for him. Unfortunately, Fred also discovers after the wedding that the couple does not want to live with Fred.

Lamont threatens once again to leave the junk business on account that they aren't making much money. However, he also wants to quit and get a full-time job due to his impending nuptials. Fred then hatches a scheme by borrowing money from the bank and pretending that business is picking up big time, while secretly working as a waiter at a restaurant down town.

Fred and Lamont take a tour through the NBC studios and Fred gets a kick out of seeing Johnny Carson's parking spot. However, what Fred really gets a kick out of is seeing Lena Horne's car and sneaks into her dressing room. After meeting her, he tries to trick her into visiting him at his home.