Why did they have to make them all the tasty colors?

Brennan is from beautiful New York City. YEAH, HE SAID IT. BEAUTIFUL. SORRY YOU’RE SCARED OF PIGEONS AND CLUTCH YOUR BAG CLOSE EVERY TIME SOMEONE SPEAKS ABOVE A WHISPER.

How dare you forsake pumpkin spice?

We finally answer the YouTube commenters’ burning question.

Sharing findom duties is a lot of responsibility.

This is what HR is for!

You think you’re so interesting that watching you play video games is entertainment.

Why don’t we just improvise gibberish like we always do?

What a sick weirdo enjoying the most popular true crime media.

If everyone likes something, that means it is both dumb and bad.

If you can’t jam random knowledge from your major into current conversations, what was college for?

You being younger than me means that I should have done everything differently.

New cast members Lily and Tao reveal their true selves in the quickest and chillest way possible.

Who wouldn’t want to smoke some “Purple Rat Poison Haze” or “OG You Will Die Alone Kush?”

Unfortunately, IT refuses to do any work on any electronics Grant owns after the slime incident.

Now that Katie’s getting married, she just wants you to know that under NO circumstances is there to be even a HINT of a flirt thrown in her direction, you filthy DOGS

Raph must be some sort of escaped psychopath and/or serial murderer if he actually ENJOYS the holiday where you dress up and have fun parties and eat candy.

Is it too much to ask for Trapp, Raph, and Jess to keep a simple 12th of the year open to celebrate Rekha’s entrance into the world?

Brennan is there for Rekha, and that means he needs to abandon all logic.

Phones are for storing important contacts like “Red Shirt – Starbucks”.

They’re throwing out the rulebook for a different copy of that same rulebook.

He might be missing teeth, but his gut flora’s never looked better.

These half-assed online pranks are so lame. Unless they’re about genie movies. Those are still good.

Oh, Grant, relax and shut up – it all makes sense if you don’t think about it.

That festive-depressive time of year for bummer carols, morbid melodies, and mugs of milky liquor.

Go ahead and remove that Blue Snowball microphone from your Amazon cart. It’s not gonna work.

I’m still sour about her sketch “Whoever Writes Our YouTube Video Descriptions Smells Like Cat Dander And Fart”.

Raph’s not a fan of our Jake and Amir dolls, even though they’re made with Jake and Amir’s real hair and skin.

“Just be yourself” only works if you’re like, super cool to begin with.

DMT’s still legal though, right?

If Grant is taller than Katie, but shorter than Zac, but Katie is taller than Zac… What the fuck is happening?!

Bad news, sir. The aliens are INTJ, and we’re ENTP. Totally incompatible.

It’s called letterboxing.

You guys are such flirty little a-holes.

Bending the laws of time and space; violating the laws of personal space.

If you’ve never used Waze to hit on a hot mama in traffic, GTFO.

We say: lean into it.

Our patronus is a mountain hare, which gives us the courage to say that your horoscope is ridiculous.

Where the hell were you?

Water is healthy, less so when you add crushed up Xanax.

When spring turns to summer/And there are blossoms on the trees/The August air doth turn to ice/And all the women freeze!

We would have crushed it in the 1770s.

At least Grant thinks they’re funny.

Alright, alright, alright…

Did you remember to subtract then re-add the super delegates?

Girl, we are getting a bottle of wine.

He’s dead serious.

The best web strategy is one you don’t understand.

The rhythm is going to kill you.

Put me down as a “Maybe”.

Visible scars are always cool, except when they’re not.

NOT YOU TOO, BOB BALABAN!

You’re just SO good at doing manual labor that I would otherwise have to do, ya know?

We are discontent with the amount of content out there.

Not to be insulting, but HOW DID YOU GET ON THE MOST EXCLUSIVE DATING APP?!

Bacon, pizza, tacos…POTATOES.

Katie’s there for you, if you confide in her immediately.

Sure, it’s undermined the fabric of our democracy AND destroyed us, but otherwise it’s a good way to kill some time.

The best things in life are free, which is why Tao’s friendship is not.

Don’t be a dummy!

Perfume is just gassy soap! I don’t *need* to enjoy things without explicit practical value!

You’re not better than anyone just because you bought tickets to see the opener.

You can’t get through life if you haven’t seen the 2001 classic “The Luck of the Irish”.

Attempting cardio isn’t going to outweigh the drugs you’ve done.

She’s technically 30, but she has the practical life skills of a toddler.

She’s salty and unpredictable, but she can cause the perfect storm. Not to mention the crabs.

Raise your hands if you only like movies starring puppets

Does the knife really have to be a metaphor?

It sounds like you’re in a healthy, functional relationship.

If you’re correcting someone, you at least have to be correct.

Do you want her to look desperate?

Go bigger or go home.

Humans heal by dumping on each other, so just tell me one weird or shameful thing about your life!

Psst, I heard Grant is getting an F.

You signed up to organize this medium-sized wedding when you were elected.

It only takes 5 minutes to walk there, so… yum?

Mutual love and respect? Sounds like somebody’s *chk-shhh* whipped!

That stale grocery store cake really shows everyone how much you care.

The truth is, wanting to feel a little better is a huge judgment on the rest of us.

It’s too hot to get cold, duh!

Exclusionary group chats only lead to violence.

If you have bad opinions, don’t agree with my good ones!

As an adult, you can’t have a real summer vacation, you’re just leaving work during the hot months.

Ignore those new age products promising to fix your nasty snatch & stick to what’s safe – nothing!

All women are beautiful (with makeup).

All good people are hot, and all mean people are ugly.

Anyone can like the sun, it takes profound genius to love the wet stuff that causes car accidents.

You went to the store and picked this out!

Raph did Ally a favor, and that deserves to be heard by everyone.

What do you expect? This guy went to acting school.

When the TV remote goes missing, Raph can’t trust Grant - or his ass.

Sure she’s competent, but could I grab a BEER with her?

Brennan’s sick, and the only cure is the approval of strangers.

It’s not beauty, it’s wellness.

Once you start hoarding emails, where does it stop?

Wow, did your parents even let you outside? I’ve seen parents like yours in movies.

Raph wishes his horny coworkers would finally make sense on this day, the holiest of the year.

Which is more annoying: robocalls, or being kidnapped? Sound off in the comments!

Trapp is saddled with a mystery of microbial proportions.

I’d rattle some chains at you, but my usual chains broke, and my ghost blacksmith got sent to purgatory, so I need to find a new one, and I haven’t gotten around to it, y’know…

Raph gets frustrated when Submarine’s friend just can’t seem to get his name right!

Real love is all about the romantic gestures he uses to manipulate and control you.

Raph’s always upset that he’s not being told things everyone else around the office knows, like that he died 6 months ago in a laptop fire.

To watch a sketch is to insert yourself into the sketch. Comedy is a shell which we can choose to inhabit and vicariously experience the humor of laughing throughout.

This sketch was written by a robot, with the help of Botnik. By the way, writers, if you’re reading this, thank you so much, we’re not going to need you anymore. Best of luck! Call if you need a reference!

If I catch ANYONE even LIGHTLY teasing Brennan, I will flip out, because he has literally no resilience and folds like origami and I don’t think he can eat solid food?

Mmm… a pot of melted junior mints.

Rekha and Grant are living in a fantasy world of new food choices, meanwhile Brennan hasn’t looked at a menu in 24 years.

Constant suffering is so much easier than remembering to find new pants.

Gartholemew’s got that irresistible shmear of mystique.

Supercalifragilisticexpialicollegedebt.

The only thing worse than someone being 30 minutes late is any confrontation with anyone ever.

Raph misses the good old days, when Cyber Monday just meant spending your savings on a TV that’s 5 inches bigger than your current one.

Trapp, Katie, and Ally are ready to go see LEBRON JAMES, but Raph is too busy eating that normal meal that we all love, a large steak and three hardboiled eggs.

Make sure to thank black women for all that they do. Then, go get a cupcake! You’ve earned it!

Katie’s meme went viral. And now that she’s in high demand from all the hollywood big wigs, she doesn’t have to talk to, acknowledge, even SHARE A ROOM with these LOSERS.

Jess is more than ready to celebrate the birth of our lord Jesus Christ but Siobhan, Katie, and Raph think it’s a little premature. We haven’t even eaten from a turkey’s carcass for Thanksgiving!

Grant and Katie will be lucky to get out of this one alive, thanks to his poor choice of scary mask and no thanks to Katie being weirdly helpful.

Katie, Jess, and Grant’s moms are all extremely good and have never done anything bad nor have any negative qualities, in my opinion. My mom, on the other hand, is a PSYCHO!

Hey, everybody has different tastes, but if you don’t like movies as a whole you’re a confusing robot to me and I don’t trust you.

She really means it this time.

If you think about it, aren’t turd holders the true persecuted minority?

Everybody worries about the victim, but what about the person that caused them pain? Are they supposed to reflect on it and change? That seems hard!

The language of love can be hard to crack.

My friends give the best advice. Did I say best? I meant most.

Raph’s creepy stalker was taking pictures of him nine months before he was even born.

What do Grant, Raph, Katie, and handsome ex-heart surgeon Bassem Youssef all have in common?

Brennan is not going to let the tiniest bit of Ebola stop him from pitching 3-4 comedy sketches.

Why won’t you do this one thing for me that I secretly want to do?

Young Thug is so uncouth. Raph prefers classic songs like Other People’s P*ssy.

The way these babies fight for their lives is so inspiring, it would be wrong to intervene.

If only nerds knew what it felt like to be mocked for their interests.

Grant’s working smarter, not harder.

Katie is the Rain Man of making up sketch pitches on the spot.

Take off your shoes in a stranger’s car just a few times, and all of a sudden you’re “disgusting”.

But he seems like such a nice guy.

I’m supposed to write a caption but honestly I wasn’t really paying attention.

So you’re telling me that my mom’s Sweetest Boy in World poll was wrong?

Can’t we all put our phones away and try to be present during this emergency?

It’s criminal how much fun we have when we go out.

Some people think office romances aren’t a good idea. Those people probably just can’t close a deal.

Sometimes when you’re bored, your mind starts to wander.

Office relationships can be complicated. Some more so than others.

A series of timely and accurate impressions.

Don’t you hate it?

This video is hardly working.

Some people think there’s more to life than work. They’re called “middle management”.

This is dark, ancient magic.

Oh, the good (sort of) old days.

She’s back. Not that you even care. You haven’t even said how pretty she looks. Tell her she’s funny.

You’ll never guess what happens in this video.

Some movies you just never want to see again. Period. Ever.

You like Hardly Working videos? Their early work was a little too New Wave for my taste.

Don’t think of him as your teacher. Think of him as your best friend. Please?

This video was shot in front of a live studio audience.

The next step in the blame game.

Suck it up.

You can pry it from his soft, foam hands.

Are you willing to fartyr yourself?

Sometimes all you wanna do is slap a butt on a thumbnail and go the eff home.

It’s crazy to think that buffoon could ever win an election.

At least Donald Duck was in the navy.

Obviously, the only way to prove to your friend that your relationship transcends decades of discrimination is to brutally mock them.

The guy who has trouble reading has us in the palm of his hand!

The saliva activates the crystals.

So Ally’s the hot new cheese on the pizza, is she? Oh, you boys!

It’s CollegeHumor’s annual gift exchange, and somebody’s always gotta be “the wise guy!”

Some promises weren’t made to be broken into tiny little pieces.

Saving the world from the burritos of injustice.

Dan teaches CH’s new editor about the Final Cut Pros and cons of making office videos.

Sometimes you have to think outside of the closet.

It’s all fun and games until you have to call Pat’s dad.

They’re gonna need a bigger battlestar.

The lack of human decency in this world is shocking.

Facebook changes everything.

His nails may be black, but his heart is tie-dye.

Meet the new director of technology or whatever.

It’s important to respect a person’s privacy. Unless you want to know their secrets.

She was fishing for them. Honestly.

Leaked footage of CollegeHumor’s biggest diva having an epic meltdown on set.

It’s the thought that counts.

Everyone has a secret. Some hide them better than others.

Wait, wait, don’t tell us.

This may be the weirdest depression ever. Period.

The most important thing about a prank is the bait. Also the switch.

A rousing game of whocummit.

CollegeHumor’s Director of Technology is back from the future.

Yo momma is so loved, you take “Mama’s Boy” as a compliment.

They grow up so fast.

That was my boy!

Sometimes you have to look out for Number 2.

Sometimes it feels like people are looking right through you.

He’s bluffing.

He wants more than your milk money.

We ride together, we digest food in our external pyloric stomach together. Starfish for life!

It’s not prejudice when it’s such a disgusting affliction.

Broken arms don’t hurt as much as broken dreams.

Sometimes two people just click, ya know?

Let the rhythm take you over. Bailamos.

Don’t call her a hero. She has no idea what that word means.

If you’re going to wax poetic, make sure you have enough wax.

Learon visits the office to get a taste of American culture, sprinkled with a little pepper sauce.

Let he who is without lunch cast the first stone.

Dan should’ve worn his contacts.

Vampires are basically a sport.

Move over, old office.

It’s just a scratch. A horrible, infectious scratch.

Task lists and Excel and faxes. Oh my.

Just go with the flow (of the placenta from the uterus).

Aww dude, I have the munchies pretty hard for a crisp Caesar salad right now.

Anticipation is Danger’s middle name.

The only thing thicker than their accents are their heads.

There’s no such thing as bad news on a basketball phone.

There’s a party in his pants and you’re not invited, you’re required.

J-Witz ain’t too smart, yo.

It’s called a mustache because it must ache to have one.

Looks can be deceiving.

Fanship is stronger than friendom.

Decision making can be dangerous.

Danger is not his middle name.

Being sucked into the bowels of Hell has never been so comfortable.

To some, Boy Meets World is more than just a show.

What if you could see the future, and it looked like an idiot?

He should really stop hitting himself.

Some jokes go too far. This isn’t one of them.

Watch your back. And your head.

The one thing he hates more than missing his nap is the sun.

It’s not what you say, it’s where you stand when you say it.

All hands on deck!

The epic battle for Middle Desk.

Streeter’s new character blows up.

If you can’t save ‘em, join ‘em.

It’s just a harmless novelty keychain, right?

If you love somebody, don’t set them free.

Love comes in all shapes and sizes.

Dan and David do a simple workout together.

An experiment gone horribly average.

Jake loves two things: partying hard and airtight arguments.

Creativity is 1% inspiration and 99% irritation.

Brace yourself.

You can’t always eat what you want.

He’s God’s GIF to mankind.