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Wills has become disillusioned with his role and calls for a referendum on the abolition of the monarchy.

Prince Charles refuses to help Theresa May secure a trade deal with the Chinese, but when Camilla withholds his conjugal rights, Charles agrees to host a banquet. Wills wants to be a hands-on dad, mixing with ordinary parents, but comes to realise childcare is a nightmare, while Pippa is preparing to marry Johnny, but is enraged that Kate has been made patron of Wimbledon and decides to put a gypsy curse on her.

President George Osborne has imposed extreme austerity since the abolishment of the monarchy. Can Wills save his family and the nation before it's sold to the Chinese?

Kate worries she's boring. Beatrice and Eugenie are offered millions to be the face of a perfume... if they cut ties with Fergie. Anne invites David Beckham for a sleepover. And Meghan's had enough.

Charles officiates at the Church of Satan. Wills is tricked by his builder. Chalet girl Beatrice catches the eye of an eligible bachelor. And Harry does a deal with his doppelganger.

Donald Trump asks Charles and Camilla to be King and Queen of America, but Wills thinks something fishy is going on. Harry hires Pippa as a nanny. Meanwhile, who will walk Beatrice down the aisle?