'Allo 'Allo! Episode Rating Graph

With René again in the possession of the sausage containing the painting of the Fallen Madonna, the attention turns to getting the two British airmen out of France. Michelle proposes a steam engine tour through Nouvion. Michelle's newest hairbrained scheme of getting the airmen out will of course need 80 meters of suspenders, and it's René's job to get them from every Frenchman in Nouvion. Herr Flick and Helga arrive in his staff car to spy on the show.

While the Captain is sitting in the café, herr Flick from the Gestapo is listening when René is talking to London on the wireless. He soon cracks the code surrounding the message with the plan to dig a tunnel from the mortuary to hide the British airmen. But it's soon apparent that the two airmen and Monsieur Alphonse need help with the digging, and the café staff are called in, leaving Madame Fanny and Leclerc in the café. But the Colonel and the Captain follow René, discover the tunnel, and are captured in the prisoner of war camp.

René has organised a secret wedding with Yvette.

It is René's birthday and he gets a series of surprises, not all of which are pleasant.

While under interrogation, Alfonse's dicky ticker starts playing up, and he is whisked to hospital. He must be either rescued or eliminated before he can spill the beans about the stolen Gestapo money.

René tries to sneak off to Switzerland with Yvette on the night train.

There is still no batteries for the wireless radio underneath the bed of René's mother in law, so Michelle's newest hairbrained scheme is to have René and Yvette powering the radio with the generator from a bicycle until the stolen batteries from a German midget submarine are delivered. The Lieutenant is finished copying the paintings (The Fallen Madonna and the Van Gogh), and delivers them as sausages. Sausages also comes from Captain Bertorelli (real ones), Monsieur Leclerc (submarine batteries), and Officer Crabtree (explosives), and soon they're all mixed up in the German officers pants.

The Colonel & the Captain and Herr Flick are all disguised as onion sellers while the German uniforms are being remade by the Jewish tailors of London. Michelle delivers a bottle of nitro-glycerin disguised as a bottle of Bols Gin to hide in the Cafe until they come to fetch it that night to blow up a German railway.

Herr Flick and Von Smallhausen almost meet their maker in front of a firing squad.

Hans mistakes the nitro for gin and accidentally blows up the railway himself! The Germans capture René, Yvette, and the peasant-disguised Colonel and Captain. As Helga, Leclerc, and Edith each attempt to help the gang escape, General Von Klinkerhoffen arrives in town and demands that the only known saboteur be shot. This means René's death by firing squad, with Lieutenant Gruber in charge of the squad!

René tries to go back to his normal life after his fake execution, posing as his twin brother, also named René, but the funeral arrangements are difficult when there is no body, Monsieur Leclerc is cheaper than the regular priest and the coffin is filled with anti-tank bombs.

René and Edith, transported to England in the place of the British airmen, get medals from Churchill and meet an old friend from the past.

Michelle and Crabtree hatch another plot to get the British airmen back to Blighty. Captain Bertorelli has stolen Gestapo money planted on him.

René attempts to sneak off to Switzerland with Yvette and four gold bars, but discovers the Resistance are intending to blow up their train.

Michelle enlists René to try to retrieve the Fallen Madonna locked in Herr Flick's safe.

René asks Edith to marry him after hearing Monsieur Alphonse's intentions of asking for her hand in marriage. Meanwhile, General Von Klinkerhoffen suspects Colonel Von Strohm of stealing his gold, while Herr Flick suspects René.

Michelle plans to release the British airmen from the drain in the square under cover of a gypsy fair, but at the last minute the Gypsies cancel.

After the Colonel's and the Captain's uniforms are borrowed by the British airmen, and later burned, they will have to send for replacement uniforms. Supplied by Michelle are carrier pigeons, which madame Edith accidentally cooks and serves to Herr Otto Flick.

Michelle of the Resistance plans to infiltrate German headquarters to rescue the British airmen using hijacked German uniforms. But who will fit them? Officer Crabtree thinks René's chances are 'farty to one'.

The Gestapo and the Italians plan to infiltrate the Resistance. Little do they know that René and friends are waiting for them.

Having been trapped in the POW camp, René is enlisted in the plan to re-dig the tunnel, by getting rid of the dirt. Hans and the Colonel are playing cricket, though not very well, and Herr Flick and Von Smallhausen are digging their own tunnel into the camp. Monsieur Alphonse arrives at the café to report to Fanny the news that René has been captured, but René and Company join in on the British prisoners' plan to escape – though only one person can escape in this way. Meanwhile, Helga reports the situation to Gruber, and together they decide on a plan to rescue the Colonel, the Captain, and René, involving Gruber dressing as a nun.

Still searching for the Fallen Madonna, Herr Flick gives Helga a truth drug.

Dressed as girls from the Folies Bergère, the entire gang (the staff and the Germans) escape from the prisoner of war camp, and completely against plans bring the two British airmen with them. Outside again, the Colonel finds that the Captain is missing, only his glasses are found. Herr Flick and von Smallhousen intercept a message from London and try to send their own message, but René catches on and tosses the radio out the window, which leaves the Resistance without a means to contact London, until Michelle thinks of the radio in Lieutenant Gruber's little tank.

The Gestapo suspects that the Colonel and the General are in on a plot to assassinate Hitler, so Herr Flick goes undercover as Private Irma Von Kinkenrotten and plants a somewhat bizarre daffodil-shaped microphone in the Colonel's office, where Gruber and Von Strohm are making plans to get rid of Bertorelli in some way. Meanwhile, as Edith prepares for her wedding, René & Co. must get the aerial for their new radio above the jamming signal of Herr Flick, so they disguise Mimi as a small nun to obtain a box kite which they fly to contact London and request plastic explosive to blow up the safe in the General's chateau to get the British Invasion plans.

Café René is the venue for a clandestine deal involving the solid gold cuckoo clock weight, Van Klomp's portrait of the Fallen Madonna and five anonymous characters wearing paper bags over their heads who answer to the names of Colonel X, Lieutenant X, Captain X, Private X and X.

René is to be given a collaboration medal for his help with the removal of Von Flockenstuffen. Unfortunately, this causes the Communist Resistance to place a price on his head. He decides once again to elope with Yvette. Michelle orders René to take the British airmen to the monastery to be picked up by a lightweight plane. Flick also learns of this news, and he and Von Smallhausen have themselves initiated into the brotherhood to gather information and capture the airmen. Unfortunately, René ends up grabbing Edith's hand instead of Yvette's, as the two are rushed aboard the plane bound for England.

Herr Flick and Von Smallhausen plan to impersonate Yvette and Mimi to search the cafe.

The latest escape plan for the British airmen involves them wading along the canal underneath a tin bath. Herr Flick and Von Smallhausen pose as escaped British airmen, hoping to be picked up by the Resistance. The Resistance have built a communication post in René's 'grave', in an effort to get around German jamming of their radio signals. René, Edith and Monsieur Alphonse try it out. René gets caught on the aerial and is hoisted above his 'grave'. Lieutenant Gruber sees him and thinks it's the ghost of René's 'twin brother'.

A rescue operation is mounted when the British airmen find themselves trapped in wine barrels in the cellars of the chateau.

Having blown the safe in Lieutenant Gruber's bedroom, René and Leclerc are surprised by its contents. The Communist Resistance lies in wait for their escape, and holds them hostage in a sawmill.

Faced with the problem of hiding 1,000 kilos of stolen high explosive, Michelle of the Resistance decides on a simple but daring course of action. It will be hidden in 500 Christmas puddings.

The Colonel and Gruber return from Spain. Meanwhile, Edith is faced with a grave situation.

Michelle comes up with an audacious escape plan for the British airmen involving a barrage balloon and 24 cylinders of helium disguised as prize-winning marrows.

René and the Resistance need to find a huge amount of money quickly to save Mimi from the Communists.

René and the Resistance find another novel way to return the British airmen to England.

Fanny and Leclerc's wedding is timed to coincide with the execution of Michelle's most audacious escape plan yet.

The Colonel, Gruber and Bertorelli desperately try to stop General Von Flockenstoffen's suicidal plan to kidnap Churchill.

Edith tries to avoid the firing squad by convincing the general that she is not Hitler.

When the British airmen are arrested paddling a tin bath down the estuary, René and his staff are instructed to rescue them from the chateau in coffins. All goes to plan, until Monsieur Alfonse challenges Monsieur Leclerc to a duel.

After the British airmen are gone for good – or so René thinks – there is still the problem of Herr Flick owning all three copies of the Fallen Madonna with the Big Boobies (one original and two fakes), and while Herr Flick kidnaps Lieutenant Gruber (a former art house worker), the Colonel and the Captain start to plan their next move. All the while, René's widow Edith have found René's will, and being the sole beneficiary, goes on a spending spree with René's money to attract better suitors. And the British airmen return as nuns. They are last seen hidden in the piano.